Female yourself and/or become a woman

Subject: Female yourself and/or become a woman
Date: Fri 14 May 1999 - 22:01:43 BST

Here is a theory:

Women, all women, choose to have their body made more female because they
believe that will help make them more successful as women.

They female themselves with smoother skin, bigger breasts, eye lifts,
electrolysis or whatever, to enhance their own self image as female and to
enhance how others see them. They believe that the more perfectly female
they appear, the easier their lives will be, in particular, easier to get
what they want from others.

This femaling, trying to be excessively female in some areas to cover lacks
of female perfection in others, is related to the expectation that women are
female, and there is power in being as female as possible. Yet, sometimes
this female power actually interferes with woman power, power that comes out
of choices, including words and actions. Femaling can be opposed to woman,
or they can be complimentary.

I ran this by a young friend of mine, born female. She laughed. "Today I
was having a discussion with another gal in the office about how I wanted my
breasts to be bigger. I was thinking that if I just was better there, my
life would be easier."

"That's a very transsexual concept," I said. "Change your body, female
yourself, and change your life, without having to engage womanly power, which
can actually be threatening to others."

She laughed. "Yes, it is!"

Some of us change sex, female ourselves (or male ourselves, though the
dynamics there are different). Some of us change gender, immersing in

Others resist sex changes, maybe because they see them as not enough. Others
resist gender changes, choosing not to be women but to be not men -- and
sometimes defining women as not men.

They are two separate tacks, related, but not bound, in the same way that
genitals and gender are related but not hard-linked.

Female yourself and you will be more successful, whatever your birth

It's a theory.


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